Moving to a Different Beat

If worship in the musical expression were a lady, our relationship would be complicated, sprouting from a rough first couple dates.

First a little back story, I got saved when I was 18 years of age (see older blog posts for more details),  and I was completely invested in my youth group, I mean it was the least I could do, it was in part because of the youth group existence that I recognized my true need to meet Jesus as my personal savior.  I do not mean where I heard the name Jesus but understood the reality, that me wearing the cross necklace and saying, "I'm a christian" wasn't the beautiful invitation Christ had in store for me.  It was because of this commitment to this youth group and my belief in the message being proclaimed there that I never really had to be pulled aside to be talked to.

So when the musical worship ended and Mr. Rowe, the youth pastor, asked if he could talk to me for a moment, it was not a normal practice.  He called me over just because I was making hand gestures for each word for "Mighty to Save" and trying to get some friends to use them. Granted I was doing it more for my attention than for His glory.  As Mr. Rowe was talking to me I remember wanting to dismiss his rebuke, classify it as a "agree to disagree" situation.  I thought we just had different views on musical worship, he liked it and I just wanted to get to the Bible study.  However, I am glad I did not harden my heart to his words, explaining the importance of showing God we love Him in a plethora of ways, including musical worship. 

That conversation was a learning moment, that has played out in my own life multiple times.  I was faced with advice given to me in a situation where I did not do anything inherently wrong, aside from trying to spice up a seemingly less important part of youth group.  It would have been easy for me to nod my head say "you're right" and just mouth the words of the worship songs to play the "good Christian role."  Instead of that lackluster passive approach, I entered into a time of investigation of the importance of musical worship. I would like to say that I came out the other side of the investigation simply captivated by all worship songs, but that would be a lie.

To this day I struggle to get fully immersed in praising the heavenly Father with song.  I question the biblical accuracy of the lyrics, and I wonder if I am singing for others in the room, or the Lord solely.  Truth  be told if church would be done my way, we would most likely sing one maybe two worship songs max.  This would be the musical stance at the Church of Kevin, despite the fact that God has moved me deeply, from time to time, via musical worship, and my knowledge that it is pleasing to the Lords' spirit to lift our voices up to Him in praise and adoration "Oh come, let us sing to the LORD; let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation!" -Psalm 95:1- The reason for the disconnect is because church is meant to be about Christ not ourselves.

Reflecting on how God has worked in my musical life has made me ask two main questions to filter my thought process through.  One: how do I handle rebuke? Do I handle it like a fool, ignoring it, or like a wise man, learning from it? "Do not rebuke mockers or they will hate you; rebuke the wise and they will love you," -Proverbs 9:8- Two: is my faith for my self-indulgence or for His edification?  It is true that true faith is living a life we were designed for, therefore we will be most satisfied as we are glorifying God.  On the other hand it is false to assume we have faith to make life easier.

Anyways, this whole post was inspired because, as you most likely know, I am going to Ireland and I started looking for Irish Christian bands. I am sure that the musical atmosphere will be as different as I have been discovering that the culture is. I am excited to embark in a completely different worship experience, musical and otherwise.  I am also pleased to  inform you that I have found an awesome Irish Christian band called Rend Collective Experience, and posted one of my favorite songs below. Speaking of Ireland, I am still pretty short financially (less than half funded) so if you can support me in that way it would be much appreciated.  Simply go to www.whm.org/give/give-to-a-missionary, then click on my name, Kevin Palcsak. Thank you in advance for the ways that you are partnering with me in God's mission in Ireland.

Procrastination and Productivity don't Mix

Ok, I plan for this to be one of my shortest post ever, but we will see how that goes. I meant to be posting more often in order to get in a habit of keeping my supports updated on what one of their favorite missionaries has been up to.  However this has been a crazy last couples of weeks, and I am just getting use to the increase pace.  I am graduating in May so it is crunch time here at ECU.  But as the title might have suggested I have not been too busy to keep up with things such as my blog, but to lazy to make the effort.  Now in the last couple of weeks I have done some really cool things, like reached out of the Christian bubble to make some cool friends and gave a talk on "The Gospel in the Old Testament" at Intervarsity the Christian organization I am a part of, which was amazing probably one of my favorite talks to give, great one end with.  On the other hand after a day of doing this that and another, some things really important others not so much so,I have also thought of all the things I still wanted to get done and just watched TV until I was so tired it made sense to just go to bed.  Currently it is 9 till 2 and I just finished some homework and felt the urge to post a update blog.  I am trying to have my post be less polished and more raw, but still have a coherent flow for others reading, it is a work in progress.  Anyways that is a short little summary of how procrastination and productivity don't mix , the same concept applies for Kingdom productivity, only even more so.  I hope*will try to get another blog posted soon more geared towards my excitement and preparation for going to Ireland!

As always if you would like to find out more about my trip to Ireland go to World Harvest Missions webiste or my previous blog "Go and Make disciples in Ireland" and/or/than contribute financially at http://www.whm.org/give/missionary?ID=22066 (half of the money was due on the 11th and I am not quite there yet).  I realize my past three or so blogs have been about my shortcomings I promise I have positive attributes, I am just prideful so it is more helpful for me to write out areas of improvements than tell you how I've been allowing God to prepare me for missions.  

*I am trying not to use the word hope as often because it is a powerful word that implies reliance, if you truly hope for something and it does not come through you will be devastated.  I truly put my hope in Jesus knowing He will save me.  I do not hope to see you tomorrow, though it would be nice if I did.     

Relatively Hot

When it is snowing outside and I make it to my apartment, it is relatively hot.  I do not mean to say that it is pretty hot in my apartment, because my roommates and I decided to not turn on the heat all winter in order to save money.  What I mean is relative to the snow outside my 40ish degree apartment is hot.  This is a obvious statement but it can be lost in translation when applied to spiritual matters.  I can seem relatively hot and on fire for God when surrounded by new and not-yet-Christians, even if I am experiencing a low in my walk with the lord. 

This can be a dangerous reality feeding into a "Pharisee" type of mind set or cynical feelings towards others.  That is why it is really great to challenge yourself by having deep conversations with the strong Christians that you know.  Obviously, the righteous road is narrow, so trapping yourself in a Christian bubble will not give you the freedom to live out the Great Commission Jesus gave in Matthew 28, to make disciples, so it is also important to share your faith with those who do not already know Jesus.  However, the witnessing aspect of the training weekend can be a blog for another time provided it is a "Luke 10" type of situation, not a "Matthew 6," if you catch my draft.  This is about the uplifting time I had bonding with my fellow missionaries in PA.

I believe Mission training was just a small sample of the great things to come this summer with World Harvest Missions.  The folks running everything set up great organizational things and the care and planning that went into the logistics of the whole weekend was clear.  Even with all that working for the training the best part of the weekend was hands down the interactions I had with other 20-some-year-old college students that had a real heart for God.  Not only did they have a spirit for God but they also had willingness to take bold steps down the adventurous path laid by the hands of the creator of all good things!  Anyone who left the Christian faith out of boredom never understood what Christ did or what His mission is!

The renewing atmosphere can hardly be put into words, it was like being in a room filled with die hard ECU (insert favorite team) fans as they are reminiscing over the previous night's overtime win.  Only instead of fans, we were members, and instead of reminiscing, we were equipping.  Members of the most high God passionately and excitedly being equipped for His missions He called each one of us to overseas.  We would be joking around about what kind of orange sour cream looking substance we trustingly were spreading over our bagel, and then... As if as natural as breathing, Jesus' name would fly across one of our lips.  It would not enter the room with the silence that can proceed the utterance of the most powerful name in everyday life.  No, there was no amplified heart beats as His name was reverently praised.  This time, it might have been something like how diversely and personally Jesus our savior works.  After adoration was verbalized, the conversation could easily flow back to the breakfast spread, or it could transform into this deep relevant and truthful proclamation of Jesus' attributes.

Being surrounded by this kind of community reminded me of the one I have only read about in Acts.  Granted no one sold property to meet a need of another brother, but I could see a glimpse of how mustard-seed faith could blossom into a martyr's dying act of joyful obedience (Acts 7).

The ability to pick any one of my fellow brothers or sisters in Christ and have an educated discussion about the Bible, and the drive to apply what we know/learn, was amazing.  This was a wakeup call for me about what being on fire for God feels like.  My concluding note is this: do not be quick to be proud because you are relatively godly. That is like saying that my apartment is hot because it’s colder outside.  God is leading His people in every cultural to some amazing things!  Of course we could take this a step further and compare my apartment to the sun , there is really no comparison, just like when our, as humans, good deeds are compared to God’s righteousness.   

For those who do not know, the training I was referring to was preparing me to go to Ireland for two months on full time missions.  More information about my missions can be found on my last post "Go and make disciples in Ireland."

Go and Make disciples in Ireland

Ok so if anyone cared to read my extremely long messy but raw last post, at the end I put a link on how to support me financially for my missions to Ireland, and I wanted to give anyone interested my official support letter.  I want to post this so that you know more about how you will be helping God move through me and in Ireland.  As much money would help me get to Ireland, pray and an actually support team praying for my needs and of the needs of the World Harvest team will help us live for Christ in Ireland not just survive the trip.  

Hey!

I am truly blessed to have an amazing opportunity to spread God’s love to Ireland this summer, with World Harvest Mission (WHM), and I am excited to invite you into the experience as well, not just financial either.  Yes, I need to raise money.  I need to raise $5,371 to be exact, by May 15^th, and I will mention where and how to support me financially at the end of the letter.  I do not want the money thing to be a stigma, in fact I am not too concerned about it; maybe it is my confidence that God will provide, or maybe it is my naïve youthful spirit, to be honest it’s most likely some combination of the two.  Either way I do not feel money is going to be an issue.  Which is in itself a small miracle, just last year that whole money topic would be so hard to mention, thinking it was in some way humiliating and that I was begging for money for nothing.  God has really worked in my heart to see that fundraising is an opportunity for others to be the blessed vessel in which God works, and I hope that is precisely how you feel about the prospect of partnering with me as I go to Ireland in the name of Christ. 

So what exactly is this great thing that you have a chance to be a part of? Well, I will be going to Ireland from June 5^th to August 5^th, while there my full time occupation will be to care and nurture an environment for the Holy Spirit of God to work and grow in.  I will be able to devote all my time to this because your contribution will cover housing, airfare, even food, and I will be able to stay strong in the spirit and endure in part because of your prayers.  I ask that you would pray for my boldness instead of my protection, and for my comfort zone to be stretched instead of a comfortable and easy time.  I had to evaluate how I wanted you to pray for me and submit it to what would bring God the most glory.  So please pray that I stay strong and never lose heart telling others about our majestic forgiver.   

In order to effectively minister in Ireland we will be partnering with Irish college students and young adults who care about the spiritual health of their homeland.  This will be a cross-cultural journey that I truly believe will allow me to see God in a context I never had before.  I plan to use however God WILL show up in guiding my next steps in life.  I am highly considering becoming a full time youth minister, urban minister, or missionary; however, I feel like I should not make that decision until after I experience what it is like to be Christian in another context.     

Now the “how” of finical support, checks can be made payable to World Harvest Mission and sent to:
World Harvest Mission
Donations Processing Center
PO Box   1244
Albert Lea, MN      56007-1244

 If you choose this route please remember to include my Pledge Card in the envelope with your donation. You can also donate online by going to www.whm.org/give/give-to-a-missionary and giving to Kevin Palcsak.

If you choose to support me in prayer, please do not forget my brothers and sisters in Christ going with me and who are already there or the Irish hearts that might be open to the true Gospel for the first time.

Your Brother in Christ,

Kevin Palcsak

I did not include the pledge card so if you plan to mail the support please let me know first so I can get you a copy of the pledge card.

I'm a Missionary not worthy of His Mission

Since my last post, so long ago, I have written starts to a lot of topics God placed on my heart. All these beginnings and ideas but with no follow trough, so they are all still in my drafts. However, all these post started because they are kingdom issues God taught me some great things about and I think my insight might help others. Why do I not finish them, at least some? That is a good question, to which I do not have an easy answer, but it will be addressed in this post as part of the reason I am not worthy to His call to be a missionary.

 First things first, I am going to Ireland for a two months missions project, but we are all commanded not called to go and make disciples, so we are all missionaries, and this post would be equally true if I was just spreading the good news in my hometown this summer. Before I move on I must admit that the subject matter in this post was one of the topics mentioned in the first paragraph and I probably wouldn't have felt compelled to work through this subject more if I wasn't going overseas to tell a different culture about Jesus, and asking other people for money to do so. Lastly before we get to the crux of this post I believe all this preamble was just a stall because this is going to be by far the hardest blog post I've every done. I am a prideful man and this is taking a deep look why I am woefully unequipped to serve my Master Jesus Christ.

I, for the most part, enjoy studying scripture, and definitely like knowing the verses to support my case. This is my opening point for why I am not good enough for God, because Jesus, God incarnate, reserved some of his harshest language for the pharisees and other religious know-it-alls. I am not saying reading my Bible is a strike against my character, Jesus the perfect God modeled for us the importance of knowing God's word, it was in part how He Himself avoided the devil's temptations. In fact we are instructed to devote ourselves to the scriptures daily. The reason some of Jesus' harshest language "son of vipers" are often times directed at me, is I find my worth in my bible knowledge, I try to form a relationship with an inanimate object, rather than the creator of life.

 “You search the Scriptures because you think they give you eternal life. But the Scriptures point to me! -John 5:39-

 I even see how the Pharisees are better then me at least they had had follow through in their false idols, they fasted twice a week memorized full books of the bible they committed themselves to the law. Yes I know this showy form of self-worship masqueraded as true worship was something Jesus warned them not to do. To be honest when I was a younger christian I was dumbfounded that the Pharisees had Jesus, the well spring of life, yet clung to their shattered pieces of drinking jars, known as religious practices. Now as I have become wiser in my own way I can relate more to them, which is a dangerous path. I understood that they grow up being taught that to please God do this that and another, then this homeless guy just strolls in saying their livelihood is built upon misunderstandings. How else do you suspect them to react? "Great Jesus I'll do it your way". I know for me when I read something in the bible that doesn't line up with My God or My way of thinking I am not quick to lay down my beliefs for the truth. What God wants and tells me to do should take precedent over tradition, but tradition is easy and comfortable with a lot of my friends supporting me in that.

 I read my Bible and it says love my neighbor as myself as part of the greatest commandment, it tells me in order to get into the kingdom of God, we with two jackets must give to those with none. I compare that with the Christian culture in America today and get nearly opposite picture. Instead of brothers and sisters giving even out of their needs, I see pastors in $50,000 cars and hear stories of homeless and humans with records being kicked out of God's place of worship. Again I look at the scripture and I see That Jesus says what you've done to the least of these you've done to me" Then I think back to the Pharisees tradition that says memorize some books tell people what to do and receive prestige and power, or follow this Jesus guy, and lose wealth respect and be hated. I respond often in the same way they did, avoidance, or trying to make my own lifestyle look more godly than the actual godly thing to do.

The realization of the difference between what Christian are called to and how a lot, not all, act can also lead to becoming cynical and/or a since of hopelessness. Cynical in the way that I did, I started following Jesus words more carefully when I was in the mood. During the time I was in the mood I acted as if I never deviated from follower Jesus. When I had compassion for a stranger I was outraged that my friend didn't share my heart, but if I wasn't in the mood there was always understandable extenuating circumstances. I felt a mix of superiority and frustration because I was reading and praying, and some of my friends were not. Frustrated they claimed Jesus with their words but I could point out their inconsistencies even in the dark. 

Forgetting the lesson taught in Matthew 7 I first must look at my own sins then others. So that is what I do sometimes, like now, reflecting on how dreadfully short I am from the perfect Holy one which is God. Keeping that lesson in minds takes me down the hopelessness path, if I am doing this that and another, and still fall so short of God my friends are surely screwed. Or well they are saved and they do not do nearly as much activity as I do, so my effort is wasted. The worst for me is when I just get apathetic to my faith due to the deep reality. Following God is impossible no one is doing a good job and it is lonely trying.

It is at this point when I walk away from the passionate drive God gave me and I re-look at His good commands for us, and I see the temporary fun in saying yes to sin but not the devastating outcomes to simultaneously saying no to God. I think how I do not do this or that or that or that and I go here and give to this resulting in giving away x amount of clothes and x amount of money, all because I want to look christian. I weigh the perceived gain against what I would lose and I think... how I have to be a Christian. This is not yet the Sunday church answer "I just got to be a Christian because life with out Him is buns. It is for the last 5 years of my life being Christian has been my life so I must be a Christian, much as I imagine, the Pharisees felt about the following the law. My whole college I've barely cared about school just enough to get good grades, never doing anything extra to set me apart from any other classmate aside from my Christian organization I am highly involved in InterVarsity. My girlfriend would not date a non-Christian the only future plans I've been looking at involve being a Christian; youth college or urban minister or missionary, all of which I am not worthy of.

Here is where the pretty bow is suppose to go, to wrap up my blog post and put a happy ending on it. That is not what is going to happen because it is part of my brokenness, I care too much about appearances, this has resulted in some earthly loses like giving some of my favorite shirts because it put all the attention on me. In the same way I care how people perceive me like my writing skills (one reason I am just posting this rather than saving in drafts till it is good enough for the public, I use to never do that, my first posts are sloppy and not the best written but I read them and I remember what God did for me then. And that is one of the reasons I started blogging to remind me of God's work in my life) especially my christian walk, so I just want to say I wrestle with not being worthy with one hand and being too prideful in the other, I am not worthy of God's love because I am messed up and try to earn it.

(awkward break)

All that I wrote is to the best of my knowledge true, but is also true that God is the one holding us up not the other way around, God died precisely because we were are not worthy. It is these truths I must submerge myself in to remember: I am worthy of the mission and the support, both finical and spiritually, I am raising for Ireland not because I am so godly, but because God is so redeeming. What other response do I have than to tell others about this kind of redemption. To wrap this post up I am confidently putting a link to World Harvest mission, the organization I am going to Ireland with, so you can get more information to pray for me about, and I have no qualms also saying God is doing great things in my life because of who He is.  So it would be a good use of your money if you also feel lead to donate financially. I say this even after a whole post of how I try to be labeled a Christian sometimes more then I try to follow Christ.  I still have this confidants only because He will not stop the good work He did in me, and I believe Ireland will be a great stepping stone of growth for me personally and He will use me in ways I can not even imagine yet.

http://www.whm.org/give/missionary?ID=22066

What Dictates Your Faith?

This is a paper I wrote and submitted for my sociology class, I have not made any changes except adding the verses to scriptures I referenced and the challenge I added at the end of my paper. O and also this intro was not part of my assignment that would be odd.

I want to preference my paper with the fact that I am a devout Christian, with strong belief in Jesus Christ as both my savior and Lord. I say that to clarify that the knowledge of the power of observation has not weakened my faith, rather it enlightened me to a phenomenon of a growing and dividing subculture to the one Christ put into institution over two thousand years ago. It is written in the Christian doctrine the bible “build up the body of Christ, until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of God’s son” [Ephesians 4:13]. Paul, the writer of Ephesians, where I got this verse, makes clear that we who claim Christ must build each other up to complete the goal we have of being united as one body in faith and knowledge of God. Now this goal was set out to the body of believers who took on the name “Christians” over sixty generations ago, and it seems as if there are more subcultures within the body of Christ than ever. There is the subcultural of Baptist, Catholic, Protestant, those who believe in predestination and those who believe in freewill. There is also the subculture of those who believe you can’t drink and others that think you must drink in remembrance of the Lord, other subgroups can’t go to the movies, still other sets think it doesn’t matter what you do. The list goes on and on of different subcultures within the revolutionary cultural that Jesus set up based on love, love for the God and for your neighbors [Mathew: 36-39]. I feel as if it is necessary to make another clarification at this time: I do not find these subcultures, in and of themselves, the problem. Subcultures can be a thriving drive behind the culture growing as a whole. Take for example the college subculture in America, in many ways it is unique and different from the American cultural as a whole. This college subculture is formed closer by factors unique to college students, like interests, but mainly because they are all in the same place in life. In this way subcultures are great to form community and fellowship. God does not work in generic formulas, so I believe there should be many different kinds of churches to reach God’s many different kinds of beloved children. On the other hand, subcultures can also be counterproductive to the culture in which it is a subversion of, by being detrimental to that culture’s goals. This can be especially devastating when the subculture causes division among what used to be one, to form two or three new but smaller separate cultures. As I have stated earlier the main objective and goal of the culture of following Christ is to Love God with all your heart, soul and mind, and love your neighbor, and it is also written that “everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord" [Philippians 3:8]. Both of these ideas came from the truth that Christians claim to believe in. All this knowledge that I have just laid out leads me to make the assumption that a good many Christians let the society, and different subcultures they belong to, dictate their relationship with the one true God. Christianity is not an elitist club, it is a needed handout given freely and undeservingly.

Challenge to think about.

Where are your deepest convictions? Are they in proving you’re right about how you think about Christ, or how your denomination is the best, or is it in the endless pursuit of perfectly loving and living as Christ did. Or is it in something that isn’t your faith, like a game, school, friends or family?

I mentioned in my paper how the college subculture is different and unique from the rest of the cultural it is a part of. Are we, as Christians, different from this world we are a part of as Christ calls us to be? [John 17:14-19]I have given them your word. And the world hates them because they do not belong to the world, just as I do not belong to the world. I’m not asking you to take them out of the world, but to keep them safe from the evil one. They do not belong to this world any more than I do. Make them holy by your truth; teach them your word, which is truth.

3 is No Longer a Crowd "The Big Picture" Grand Finale

Back to the life of Paul, the reason he had to escape out the window is because he was boldly proclaiming the Lord’s name (Acts 9:22-23). The fact that he had to sneak out of a city for his confident and powerful speaking as an ambassador of Christ is an illustration of Great faith. However, the character and power of Jesus shines bright when we take a look at who Saul was just before this event took place. Chapter 9 of Acts starts off with Saul’s eagerness to kill the Lord’s followers (verse 1). He planned to go to Damascus and bring Christians back in chains (verse 2). O’ how the Lord changes the plans and hearts of His people. He turned Saul's life upside down by coming to him the way he was, not waiting untill he was living a perfect life(Acts 9:3-5). Jesus wastes no time guiding Saul's steps right away (9:6). Although He loves us no matter where we are, He desires far better for all of us, He desires for us to prosper in His will (Jeremiah 29:11-12). The Lord also sent someone to follow up with his will for Saul, work on both his physical wants and more importantly his spiritual needs while he was busy praying. Prayer is an important part of one's pursuit towards the purist only true God. He used Ananias a man that had good reason to be scared of Saul for the task of healing and verifying (Acts 9:11-17). You never know how your actions are going to affect someone else's faith, so always try to live in God's will and don't let fear be a reason to shy away from God's commands.

God is active in your life he does not play a passive role, he is continuously reaching out to improve yours and His relationship, which in turns improves your whole life. This is not the only time God unambiguously changes Paul, I am confident in the statement that God had to intervene many times in Paul's life, as He must in all of our life. what makes Paul such a godly man is he listened. If we look back at 2 Corinthians Paul openly admits that he and Timothy were overwhelmed, much like Mark was in Acts chapter 13. Also like Mark they were relying on themselves rather than God (2 Corinthians 1:8-9). This is why I find it no coincidence that in verse 4 of the very same chapter he talks about how God comforts us so that we can comfort others. A message so strong that Paul felt compelled to write to Timothy (1 Timothy 1:15-16) with the same message of forgiving because we are forgiven an estimated five years later. It is my belief that Paul wanted to warn his pupil against making the same mistake he made.

The overwhelming experience Paul mentions in 2 Corinthians could and almost certainly is a factor in Paul and Mark’s reconciliation. He could have better understood what Mark might have gone through and felt the comfort of the Lord and was ready to provide comfort to Mark. As I said earlier having faith in Christ Is not a life time pass to bliss-ville, suffering will come in our life. In fact sometimes we will be faced with afflictions because of our faith. God does not orchestrate evil or hardships, but he will make good come out of any situation when you give your life to Him. This good can happen situationally but even more often, He corrects our outlook and/or our priorities. In Paul and Timothy’s example their suffering leads to knowledge of how to rely on God, a life lesson of forgiveness and in this case God even rescued them from their dangerous situation. This improvement through trials takes a trust in God to guide you (Isaiah 58:11).

This reunion in faith is made apparent when Paul writes 2 Timothy chapter 4 verses 11 “…Bring Mark with you, for he is useful to me in my ministry.” This one verse might not seem like much more than a simple invitation by itself or even in context of the whole book of Timothy. However as I hope to have proven, when looked at as part of a big picture this kind gesture of friendship is turned into a potent representation of magnificent reconciliation through Jesus Christ our Lord.